God’s Care and Love

In searching for an old email I found this note from 2006. I remember the incident well but had forgotten the lesson I learned.

It was early October and I was sitting at my desk at the office when I heard a disconcerting racket from about 10-15 crows out back. I looked out the window and saw what I thought was a mother duck in a shallow ditch trying to protect her duckling from the crows.

I quickly hurried down the stairs outside and as soon as my feet hit the bottom step the crows dispersed like a crowd of hoodlums that had gathered to watch a fight. I walked over to the area of the ditch and couldn’t see a duck or duckling or anything. Then I looked under a patch of grass and there was a small frightened pigeon laying on the ground. I looked around for the crows that had quieted down considerably and I saw the thing that I thought was a duck. It was a huge hawk sitting on a low branch in a nearby cedar tree! He had been attacking the pigeon and the crows were either calling for help or more likely cheering him on hoping for some leftovers.

I wasn’t sure what to do and I was a little hesitant to pick the pigeon up without a gloves or a towel, but when I looked up in the tree again I knew if I walked off to get something that HAWK would finish off his catch. So I reach down and picked up the pigeon; he was so scared I could feel his little heart beating wildly in my hand. He had one small puncture wound under his wing. He did not struggle with me at all; I guess at the time, I was the lesser of two evils. I put him in a little outside storage area off the front deck at the office with some food and water. I left the door slightly open should he want to leave. My pigeon friend was still there the next day although not as happy to see me. When I checked on him the following day he was gone.

I know that this is the way of nature. The hawk was beautiful and needed to survive as well, but that day, this poor little pigeon was going to be rescued. Chris and I had been going through a stressful period with enemies attacking relentlessly and there were groups of gawkers watching on the sidelines waiting for us to be devoured. Considering all these things, I really needed this little pigeon to be rescued and saved.

It was an illustration to me of how God cares for us even when it seems we are being attacked on all sides. I realized He cares for me and loves me more than I cared for this little wild pigeon that I wasn’t going to abandon to be destroyed by his enemy the hawk.

A gentle comforting reminder that God is always watching over me and protecting me from my enemies. He picks me up, takes me in his arms and shelters me in his hiding place.

Lord, how I love you! For you have done such tremendous things for me. The Lord is my fort where I can enter and be safe; no one can follow me in and slay me. He is a rugged mountain where I hide; he is my Savior, a rock where none can reach me, and a tower of safety. He is my shield. He is like the strong horn of a mighty fighting bull. All I need to do is cry to him—oh, praise the Lord—and I am saved from all my enemies! ~ Psalm 18:1-3 NLT

Lost Souls

Chris and I went to Seattle back in November to drop something off for youngest son. We stop at a local favorite, Ivar’s Fish Bar, for fish and chips. As we watched people wait in line, properly social distanced, I said to Chris, “People in the city all look like they are lost souls.”

Maybe they were just caught up in their thoughts as they wait for their orders, but it seemed they were sad. You could see no smiles as they all had masks but also there was no nods or greetings, no air of happiness around them, people that were together just stared at the ground. The mood was as grey as the day.

As we left, we drove past rows and rows of tents, in the parks on the roadside, in parking lots and on the sidewalks in front of homes and businesses. I remember just 7 years ago when I lived in Seattle with JD for six months that I would occasionally see a tent or homeless camp. Now, trying to figure out what changed it all, is mind boggling. Especially in this city where there is so much opportunity and wealth.

Drugs are a big part and our lenient system has drawn people here from other areas. It is heartbreaking for the people, those on the streets and those trying to raise their families and work.

Chris is on the board of the local homeless shelter and everyone’s situation is different and complex. It takes more than just providing shelter, it takes investing in their lives and providing services to overcome the crisis they are in, whether it is mental illness, drugs, alcohol or abuse. Sometimes tough love is appropriate.

A few weeks after our Seattle trip, Eric Johnson’s “Fight for the Soul of Seattle” documentary was released, a follow-up to his March 2019 piece, “Seattle is Dying” which received Edward R. Murrow Regional Award for documentary as well as a Northwest NATAS Emmy Award for Documentary. I watched the 90 minute video in tears; not only for the lost, addicted and forgotten but because it seems we have no ability to provide long lasting help for the people.

The problem overall seems insurmountable. How can I, as one person, fix this enormous problem with so many complicated and unique variables? I cannot, other than supporting sound policies. However, I am of the belief that God often places people in our path that need guidance. Many times, we have extended support for people who have lost there way. Sometimes it lasts only a few weeks, and for others it is a long process. Who knows if there was really a lasting impact on their lives but Chris and I are in one accord about this: We cannot help the whole world but we can help the one in front of us.

Lost souls, they are out there. Offer what you can when they are in front of you, it may only be a granola bar in your pocket but if we all add a drop to of kindness maybe it will grow in to a sea of compassion.

Palindrome Day 1/20/21


Today is a palindrome day, the first of a 10 day stretch of them. The date is read the say forward and backwards, a good analogy for the times…Everything will be the same forward and backwards.

God is on the throne, His will be done. People will love and people will hate, there will be births and there will be deaths, good and evil, loyalty and betrayal, leaders will rise up and leaders will fall. If you are looking for something new, something different, want change? Don’t look to any leader. Look to God.

My prayer: God, help me look into my own heart, examine my own thoughts and actions find the what it takes to overlook the flaws in others and make the change in my heart and mind.

Nothing new on this earth, set your heart on eternity.


Ecclesiastes 1:9-18 GNT
What has happened before will happen again. What has been done before will be done again. There is nothing new in the whole world.
“Look,” they say, “here is something new!” But no, it has all happened before, long before we were born.
No one remembers what has happened in the past, and no one in days to come will remember what happens between now and then.
I, the Philosopher, have been king over Israel in Jerusalem. I determined that I would examine and study all the things that are done in this world. God has laid a miserable fate upon us. I have seen everything done in this world, and I tell you, it is all useless. It is like chasing the wind.
You can’t straighten out what is crooked; you can’t count things that aren’t there.
I told myself, “I have become a great man, far wiser than anyone who ruled Jerusalem before me. I know what wisdom and knowledge really are.”
I was determined to learn the difference between knowledge and foolishness, wisdom and madness. But I found out that I might as well be chasing the wind.
The wiser you are, the more worries you have; the more you know, the more it hurts.

No Fight Left … Only Love

I saw my mother yesterday. She was a little confused and in quarantine because of her latest hospital visit.

Over the years my mother and I have had our shared joy and trials, times when we saw eye-to-eye and many times that we clashed. There were times I felt suffocated and pulled away and times she clung tighter.

The last few years because of her decline into dementia it seemed the clashes were more frequent and heated. I was not-so-affectionately called the “bossyone” In reality, I was trying to enable the very thing she wanted, to remain independent in her home, by making sound decisions and managing her finances.

An unfortunate fall in 2018 lead her to rehab where she could no longer hide her advancing dementia.

She will still produce a beautiful smile on request.

We have been through a process the last three years. Just as infant grows and advances at a rapid pace between birth and four years. It seems dementia takes a turn and in three short years my mothers abilities have declined at a rapid pace.

She had surgery in October and the decline has been even more sharp since then. When I saw her this week she was so frail and helpless, she stared off into space as a newborn does when it is seeing the strange new world for the first time. She found comfort in being held, holding my hand and was soothed by the sound of music – the old hymns she would play for hours. The words to those she has not forgotten.

We have gone from my birth and total dependence, to growing, changing, challenging, disagreements, coming together, growing apart, to facing the honest truth of our relationship. Then it reversed: growing apart, coming together, disagreements, challenging, changing (especially in my views about her illness and motives), to her growing old and total dependence on others.

Now she just wants to be loved, be safe and protected. We have come full circle from the newborn daughter a mother held in her arms 65 years ago to yesterday as a daughter held her innocent elderly mother in her arms.

I braided her hair and put the pearl necklace on her that my auntie sent. Girls should always wear their pearls.

There is no fight left, what is left is only pure love.

The New Year’s Gate

Several years ago my friend Pam introduced me to this poem, God Knows, written 1908 by Minnie Louise Haskins. Since that time I have posted this photo at the eve of the new year with the first verse that begins… And I said to the man who stood at the gate of the year: “Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown.” “Go out into the darkness and put your hand into the Hand of God.
That shall be to you better than light and safer than a known way.”

I immediately fell in love with her wisdom and prose on how to face the unknown… that holding God’s hand is safer than knowing the way. How awesome is that?

I occasionally see this photo in my phone’s photo album and it is a reminder to me that whatever lies ahead is solely in His hands and God has always been beside me.

This year that has been horrific for many, has spared me most of the struggles to which others have suffered. However there has been loss; due to covid – I lost a friend and a cousin. Sadly, I also lost three friends to cancer and a step-brother to heart failure. Every loss is painful, every struggle is trying but I have learned from past trials that these days and times will pass.

In 2013 and 2014 there were the days that I feared taking another breath because I was afraid of what the future would deliver. I wanted time to freeze and stand still, but however bleak the future seemed, God walked me through. It is remembering those moments and countless ones before that help me walk by faith into the future.

Each time God showed me His compassion, His love, His strength, it gave me one more brick to stand on and when trials come, I have those bricks from His past faithfulness to rely on for the courage to face each day. Where I once fell apart, I may now mourn and grieve but I know God has a plan and He will see me to the other side.

As I stand at the gate of this new year, I put my hand in the hand of God.
Whatever 2021 brings, I will strive to:
Make everyday a new beginning;
Remember every evening as the sun sets, to give thanks for the blessings in my life;
Forgive others, and forgive myself and ask for forgiveness for the wrongs I have done.
Remind myself, that God is always faithful.

The Lord’s acts of mercy indeed do not end, For His compassions do not fail. They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness. Lamentations 3:22-23 NAS

God Knows

And I said to the man who stood at the gate of the year:
“Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown.”
And he replied:
“Go out into the darkness and put your hand into the Hand of God.
That shall be to you better than light and safer than a known way.”
So I went forth, and finding the Hand of God, trod gladly into the night.
And He led me towards the hills and the breaking of day in the lone East.

So heart be still:
What need our little life
Our human life to know,
If God hath comprehension?
In all the dizzy strife
Of things both high and low,
God hideth His intention.

God knows. His will
Is best. The stretch of years
Which wind ahead, so dim
To our imperfect vision,
Are clear to God. Our fears
Are premature; In Him,
All time hath full provision.

Then rest: until
God moves to lift the veil
From our impatient eyes,
When, as the sweeter features
Of Life’s stern face we hail,
Fair beyond all surmise
God’s thought around His creatures
Our mind shall fill.

Minnie Louise Haskins 1908

Christmas Is

Never fear, do not let in fear,
Even in this unbalanced and unpredictable year.
Christmastime will still appear.

Never give way to doubt, do not doubt.
Although 2020 had us cast about,
It will not keep the Christmas spirit out.

Always hope, do not lose hope,
Although at times we could not cope,
This spirit won’t stop, not this one, nope.

Pray for peace, peace from within.
If not today, pray we may understand when,
And search our hearts, so we may know how to begin.

Christmas teaches love and our faith it renews;
Faith in ourselves, and others if we choose,
Respect for our own and also their views.

Continue to love, love does not end.
Keep reaching out to Family and reach to a friend
For Christmas is so much more than a trend.

In the new year we’ll make a fresh start;
We will not let these trials tear us apart.
For Christmas is always deep in our heart.

Do not fear, Do not doubt, Always have hope, Pray for peace, Renew your faith and Continue to Love


~ trish b (c) 2020

Longing for Peace

While we are lamenting about this year 2020 and the horrors of how awful it has been, I am reminded of a Christmastime in a year not so far in the distant past when I was in distress over the events of the year past.

It was 2014, there was unrest around the world. Evil people were plotting their evil schemes and committing unspeakable crimes on the innocent. However, we tend to forget; these were my sorrows then.

I’m having a really hard time finding the holiday spirit. Where are the 300 young girls that were kidnapped? A few days of news and we moved on. How many people have been beheaded? Horror at the first one then successively our shock and outrage has waned. Planes shot down, planes never found; not even a scrap of metal. Worshippers brutally stabbed inside their synagogue. Children slaughtered. Anger, hate, anger, hate everywhere — I cannot be consoled by holiday lights and trimmings. The sorrow is burning deep in my heart.

We feed off the sensationalization of it all, but move on like it was yesterday’s a bad weather. Real evil exists in people and groups and they are actively plotting their next move. Real evil!

I long for peace.

In 2014, I was longing for peace. I think every year that is my prayer. Covid 19 has taken many lives, it has isolated us from our loved ones, our spiritual support and destroyed the financial stability of many families. However in this storm we have also come to realize many things we had taken for granted. The one most important thing we take for granted, our freedoms.

I don’t know what 2021 will hold. Will it be worse than 2020 or 2014? Will we come together? Will we see each others smiles again? Will we go back to our churches and congregations and sing praises again? We will have peace?

I don’t know.

I have no insight to the future. I just know that whatever it holds, God will see me through or he’ll call me home.

For a Child will be born to us, a Son will be given to us; And the government will rest on His shoulders; And His name will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Eternal Father, Prince of Peace. ~ Isaiah 9:6 NAS

Remembering ~ Jesse ~

My friend Jesse was called to his heavenly home on Thanksgiving. Over the years Jesse and I had many, not heated, but terse discussions regarding our beliefs, our politics, social issues, etc. Sometimes I would get very frustrated over the fact I could post the most innocent thing and Jesse would find a way to make a controversy out of it. He was passionate about his beliefs and there were times he challenged me to think about things differently. I imagine him today in Heaven debating the greatest theological minds and loving every minute.

I first met Jesse through mutual friends, Mel and Elaine, who no doubt have greeted him in Heaven.  Mel, like Jesse, was a proponent of the unorganized church  and they would meet with a group of men at the local Shari’s restaurant once a week.

When we moved to a piece of property near Jesse on Union Hill, we hired him to help us clear the land so we could build a house.  He was a wild man in the trees.  He’d climb to the very top and snap the limbs off on his way up.  I have a video of him riding high in the treetops.

One Saturday morning after we had cleared the land and were living in a travel trailer on the property, Jesse came down the drive and gave us a little kitten that his dog Sarge had drug out from underneath his truck.  We named him Fang because according to Jesse he put up a good defense against Sarge’s advances. Fang became part of our household along with our two little dogs and adult cat PC.  

A few weeks after Fang became part of our family, PC got lost in the woods away from the clearing.  I could hear him howling in the forest so I trekked out calling for him in a pair of shorts and flip flops.  As I was looking I stepped up on an old rotten stump to get a better view.  As soon as I stepped on the stump an army of yellow jackets came swarming out from underneath my feet, stinging and attacking me violently.  In an effort to escape,  I lost my shoe and I was frantic – jumping and trying to get away through the dense underbrush.  It was then I began to think this forest life was not for me.  

Jesse stopped by that evening to say hello and talk about life and God as he often did.  When he heard my tale of woe, he immediately got up, left and came back a few minutes later armed with a can of hornet spray.

Now imagine this, it was dusk, Jesse was wearing only a yellow tank top, a cap, shorts and sneakers.  With no other protection, he marched into the forest with this can of hornet spray and a big stick.  He squatted in front of the rotten stump and began to dig into the nest with the stick and spray at the same time.  He was like the avenger!  Shockingly he did not get one sting but hundreds of hornets were massacred that night.

That’s the way Jesse did things, straight forward –  without fear.  No fear, only boldness about his faith as well.  He was always ready for a great discussion or debate.

The last time I saw Jesse and Janna they stayed a few nights with us before venturing out to the east coast to be nearer his son and his family.  Jesse spent a few days working on and repairing their motor-home for the journey.  This motor-home was older and packed to the gills, I was more than skeptical of its ability to make it across country.   Nonetheless, venture off they did, no fear, only faith in God to take care of them on the journey.  

As we watched them drive away, I told Chris I feel like I am watching one of my kids drive off into the big wide world and I need to intervene or protect them.  However, I know now what Jesse knew then, he relied on his God for protection and guidance.  His faith was great and it saw him through many tough times.  

For in the gospel the righteousness of God is revealed—a righteousness that is by faith from first to last, just as it is written: “The righteous will live by faith.”  Romans 1:17 NIV

America Gives Thanks

One week until Thanksgiving and I thought I would share my sentiments and memories from last year about Thanksgivings past.

There so much controversary over the family gatherings this year it saddens my heart that these issues may overshadow the spirit and intent of the holiday.

I won’t be at the American Legion this year and my mom won’t be able to have a celebration with anyone of us. It will be just Chris and I, or possibly with a few friends, but one thing for certain, we will sit around the table and say thank you for the many, many, blessings we have in this country.

We are not infallible, but we are a great nation; we are caring and generous people; we are a people who recognize with gratitude the freedoms we share. America is the dream of many people around the world. We will get through this and we will come back stronger. This is our holiday and next Thursday, whatever the circumstances, we will bow our heads and give thanks.

Thanksgiving

Rogelio, My Friend

It was a drizzly grey day outside today. Rogelio showed up at 7 AM to do a fall clean up of my yard.

We met Rogelio 18 years ago. He had a house in the next town over that was built near abandoned coal mines and he needed an analysis done which our company did for him. Through the process he let us know he did side jobs landscaping, so as we had 3.5 acres of yard to care for, we hired him to help us.

Rogelio has so many amazing qualities the at the top of the list is his skill to turn the mess of my yard into a woodland paradise. He cleared the beds, he created rock gardens, trimmed the shrubbery, edged the lawn and he with his sons would more in 8 hours than I could accomplish in months.

I have always told people that Rogelio got all the credit for the beauty in my garden.

Rogelio has shared many other talents with us. He has helped build fences, helped haul away junk, polished concrete floors, updated and installed lighting, laid patio bricks and the list could go on and on. He has always been willing to help in any way. He would see something that needed attention, set a proposal for getting it done and get it done he would.

He is a man with a natural God-given wisdom. He believes hard work is the key to happy life.

Rogelio would say that the struggles of life makes you strong and gives you a will to live. “Man has to fight for life.”

Yep, this is a just out-of-bed uncombed hair photo. Not everyone gets to see me like this!

Through the years we have gotten to know each others families. We have shared our common concerns for our aging parents, his father and mother in Mexico, and my mother in Texas.

A few months ago he showed up at the house on a Saturday morning with a bottle of Tequila he brought back from Mexico. As you can see below it was no regular bottle of the Tequila. It was a massive big bottle. He told Chris he had been in Mexico helping people, he had brought money and supplies to family and friends. He said that helping others was something he learned from Chris. Always be generous and you will always have more to share. Humbling.

As the years have gone by we all have aged. Rogelio’s hair has a tinge of gray now but he still works as hard as he did in his 30’s. He showed up at 7AM this morning and worked until 3. A long day in the drizzling rain and in the end the yard was beautiful and ready for winter. I asked if it was getting to be too much for him, he says not. He loves the serenity of this place and being outdoors. Before he left, we visited a while. We talked about our families, the virus and the measures we are all taking to stay safe. We thanked him, he thanked us.

This is Rogelio my friend. He makes my garden beautiful and I am thankful for him.

Finding My Grateful Heart

“If you concentrate on finding whatever is good in every situation, you will discover that your life will suddenly be filled with gratitude, a feeling that nurtures the soul.”
~ Rabbi Harold Kushner

Looking back through the history of just my life, I am wondering if I can find good in every situation? This is a tall order. It cannot be done with my own power but only by endeavoring to see it through the lens of God’s eyes.

Yes, there were hardships and obstacles that dominated my youth but I can recognize how they helped form who I am today. In many ways I think those experiences help me look at others who struggle with a compassionate heart and less of a judging mindset.

More recent trials I find harder to envision the blessings with my inadequate mortal eyes. However, for every injustice I can find mercy, for every harsh word a kind one and for every heartache a joy.

In the bigger picture of things… I. Am. So. Blessed!

I really have nothing to complain about, yet I do complain. Praying my gratitude overshadows my grumbles today and that my heart will be continually grateful.

“He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also He has put eternity in their hearts, except that no one can find out the work that God does from beginning to end.” Ecclesiastes 3:11 NKJV

Gratitude: For our Veterans

Veterans, today I honor and thank you for serving in defense of our freedoms and the freedom of people all around the world.

I did some research and found that those currently serving in the US Military, all branches, comprises (.4%) less than HALF of ONE PERCENT of the population of the United States. In 1970 during the Vietnam War it was only 1.4%

Today there are 18.2 million veterans living in the US going back to WWII. So total the percent of US citizen still living is just 5.5% of the population.

They truly are, and were, the select, the brave and the few who sacrificed much for the protection and security of the 99% of the rest of us.

They have given of their heart, their soul and shed their blood; they did so for love of their country, with a sense of honor and pride. Their devotion does not fade. They are a noble group, a very small percentage of our population who answered the call to serve.

My promise is to honor and remember everyday and keep them always on my heart and in my prayers.

May God bless you and keep you and protect your heart and mind.

Known Only to Him

Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the Lord,
I will be joyful in God my Savior.
The Sovereign Lord is my strength;
he makes my feet like the feet of a deer,
he enables me to tread on the heights.
Hab 3:17-19

Election night, 2000, I was with Chris sitting at SeaTac airport with a group from our congregation headed to Israel to meet our pastors and begin a tour of the Holy Land.

People had their eyes on the TV’s throughout the airport waiting for election results. Just before we boarded the plane around midnight, all the news outlets announced that Al Gore had won the presidency. Fast forward eighteen hours later when we landed in Israel and everything had changed. Nothing was certain, Florida was undecided, hanging chad problems prompted microscopic evaluations of ballots and recounts began. Each morning when we boarded the tour bus there was an update, no final decision on US Presidential election.

We were sheltered from the daily bombardment of the drama going on at home. We spent our time in Israel praying for the people in the land and praying for God’s will to be done.

We returned twelve days later on November 20 and still no decision. Not until December 12, did the Supreme Court end the Florida recount and George W Bush was declared the winner.

I am taking a lesson from that period in time; listening to no news, no talking heads, no analyst and putting my faith in God and knowing He is the ultimate decision maker.

I often found myself cringing at Trump’s comments and brashness. However, I was somewhat reassured that at least I knew how he truly felt about an issue as opposed to a typical politician (any party) who speak out of both sides of their mouth. I had friends in 2016 that warned me Trump would destroy the country, that he would start WW3, that the LGBTQ community would be in fear for their lives. None of that came to pass. All the horrifying things people on the opposing side are saying about the current administration are likely to not be as tragic either.

God often uses our flaws for His good. Today, I have been thinking about the other half of the country and how we have such polar opposite views on so many things. I have been praying for wisdom to see more of what I have in common with the other side and to love and not hate.

I keeping singing the hymn “Known Only to Him” over in my head and this verse:
“I know not what the future holds but I know who holds the future.”

Good News & Blessings from 2009

I keep coming across snippets of things I wrote many years ago. Here is one from March 2009.

Eleven years ago and I was seeing the negative impact of the main stream media; the constant bombardment of bad news and the attempts to control us by fear.

Since then, the rhetoric has ramped up, the hate has increased, the fringe radical groups are given more and more attention with less and less accountability.

In this month of Thanksgiving be thankful for the blessings we have. Turn your back on those who wish to divide us. Help those less fortunate, share your talents, share your blessings and share some love. ❤️

GOOD NEWS & BLESSINGS

Mar 14 2009

Good News

Today I live in America and it is still the place where people from all over the world want to come to fulfill their dreams.

Good News
Today I live in America and it is still the place where people from all over the world want to come to fulfill their dreams.

Are we always right? No
Have we been Blessed? Yes
Even today, do we have more food, shelter, jobs,opportunities, & wealth than most of the world? Yes

Stop complaining, Start Living…

Stop listening to the news… it seems they are now thriving on “FEAR MONGERING”

Find “your” belief in the American Dream that others risk their life to come here for.

The sky is not falling and Americans aren’t a nation of Chicken Littles. We are people that face challenges straight on, keep putting one foot in front of the other and keep going.

And again …turn off the TV and the News…. it is depressing, it is brainwashing, it kills your motivation, it makes you want to give up.

You will be much happier!

Oh and by the way, It is a beautiful world!

Life Will Find a Way

I came across this photo I took on this day three years ago. It is a picture of a tiny fern growing underneath a concrete ledge.

The amazing thing about this fern is that the ledge where it is growing is on the 47th floor of the Westin Hotel in downtown Seattle, 449 ft above the city.

At the time I took this photo, I was struck by the ability of such a small plant to take root and grow in a thin crack of concrete. How far and how high did the spores need to travel to reach this lofty height and settle in? No fertilizer, no special care or tending just sun and rain. I know rain seems to be in abundance in Seattle but this fern had most likely rooted during the warm summer. Did it sustain itself from the fog and warm moist ocean air that came in from the Puget Sound? How exactly did it find that “one spot” to lodge itself, take root and hold on in the winds that blow in off the water that are aided and strengthened by the effects of the Olympic Mountains? The answer, only my conclusion and insight here; Life and the will to survive is strong and even a fern finds a way to carry on.

It is a promising sign that even in the harshest circumstances life will find a way to thrive. Living in this time of lockdowns and corona virus where many are afraid for the future. Take heart because just like this little fern, growing under the ledge on the 47th floor of the Westin Hotel in downtown Seattle, we will find a way to adapt and persevere even though it’s not always easy.

ANEVER

I saw recently where someone wrote, “I am and always will be anever Trumper.”  When I first saw it I read “AN EVER” … I thought that’s an interesting way to support the president reversing the phrase. Then I realized they were really saying “A NEVER” unless it was an interesting parapraxis.

What a difference a space makes. A space that can turn something positive into a negative. I was intrigued by this little typo and wondered if i was “an ever” or “ a never”

F037A17D-F786-411C-98D8-651EAA0EE950

I want to be AN EVER faithful friend, an ever hopeful person with an ever positive outlook, someone an ever joyful heart, with an ever song on my heart and be an ever believer in the living God.

I pray I do not fall into the A NEVER side of life, a never happy spirit, a never loyal friend, a never helpful person, a never kind word to say, a never respecter of life, a never believer in a higher power.

The space before the “N” or after the “N” may determine your fate. Decide before “the end” because after will be too late.

 

Watercolor Image by Stephanie Ryan from 2019 Gratitude Calendar

I Found a Nickel

Recently the AC unit was replaced at our office; a very old unit it still chugged along but no longer efficient.  A80AD951-E1D4-407D-BBBA-06B6B34BAB26The new unit was relocated to the back of the building leaving a concrete pad on the side of the building. After the work was done and the unit hauled away, I walked by the pad and noticed a dark circle on the pad. I reached down to pick it up and found it was a nickel; an almost black discolored nickel.

I tried to rub away enough tarnish to see the date but it was not easy to read. Finally in the light I see it is stamped 1980.  I thought, not really so old for it looked like it had been there 100 years. Then I realized that although it did not seem that old it had been there forty years —- forty years just hiding under the AC unit as the world and time moved forward.

This nickel in it’s shiny new condition was cloaked from the light when Ronald Reagan was elected the 40th President of the United States, November 4,1980. There in 1981, when the AIDS virus was first identified. In 1982, when I met my husband of the past 37 years which was long before I ever set foot in this little town, it was there.

Unseen in 1985 when the nuclear reactor at Chernobyl exploded sending 8 tons of nuclear reactive material into the atmosphere.  It remained hidden in 1986 when the shuttle Challenger exploded shortly after launch.  There in 1988 when a PanAm 747 exploded from a terrorist bomb that sent it crashing  to the ground in Lockerbie, Scotland.

Concealed in 1989 when the Berlin Wall came down and in December when the Romanian uprising overthrew the Communist government just days before my youngest son was born at the University of WA Medical Center.

It had possibly lost some luster in 1991 but it made no movement as the Soviet Union broke up after President Gorbachev resigned.  In that same year my oldest son was nearly killed in a motorcycle accident.  In 1992 when Bill Clinton was elected president and when my middle son graduated high school just a few miles away it remained sheltered from sight. It was there one year later as the same son was wounded in Somalia during the Battle of Mogadishu, on October 3, 1993.

Fast forwarding through the rest of the 90’s – wars in Serbia, Croatia, and at home in Oklahoma City. OJ killed his wife and the president cheated on his.

When the world entered the new millennium this nickel was now 20 years old.  In 2000, I technically became the owner of this hidden coin as we purchased the building with it’s old AC and it’s hidden coin that remained safely beneath.

This nickel stayed in the dark through the darkest days of 9-11 in 2001. There as the younger Bush became president and we went to war in Iraq and Afghanistan.   It remained as as dictators were ousted from power or died… Saddam, Arafat, Milosevic and many other men who’s hearts were set on evil.

In 2009 Barack Obama was sworn in as the 44th president of the United States.  In the middle of Obama’s years my world was rocked by my own personal tragedies as my youngest son was diagnosed with IBD, underwent 5 surgeries and spent weeks and months in the hospital and ICU after several life threatening events. Through all this, a nickel now tarnished and black lay hidden.

There have been many changes in the world in those 40 years.  I didn’t think this nickel was so very old but in the time it lay undiscovered under the AC unit it had aged and tarnished just as much as we had as we found our way through the last forty years.  As much as things changed they have stayed the same. There is still war and unrest in the world, people no matter how much they talk about peace can’t even make peace with their neighbors and fellow citizens. It seems there is a greater desire to be right than to find common ground.

I found a nickel and it spoke to me

Journey of Faith

Tomorrow: My youngest son’s 30th birthday. For over 10 years he has battled with several auto-immune diseases. Sometimes referred to as invisible diseases, as many suffer without external signs that are obvious to those around them, but for them they are more than apparent. His decline over the past year and a half has been heartbreaking to witness.

Prompted by a video made by friends regarding healing, where they visited the pools of Siloam and Bethesda and prayed, Chris and I made the decision to use our upcoming Israel trip to visit these places and pray for our son and pray for healing.

As time drew near I worried that my planned journey may have some element of superstition attached to it. That going there gave the appearance that those places held some sort of power that bordered on the mystical where I was expecting a miracle that God could only deliver from there.  I did not want that.

We talked about it and decided we would go as planned and pray; to go and be open to any message God had for us.

We started our day early and had reservations to stay overnight at the American Colony Hotel in Jerusalem. We made it to the American Colony about 12:30, as our room wasn’t ready, we hired a taxi and made our way to the Pool of Siloam.

The driver drove through the Arab neighborhood in East Jerusalem to find the entrance where our friends, who had made the video about healing, had gone. The man at the entrance sign near the street told us we had to go through the City of David to reach the pool. So the taxi took his back up the hill and dropped us off at the entrance.

When we got inside we paid the entrance fee and were told we’d have to walk through the Canaanite tunnel, a narrow tunnel from an earlier period of more than 1000 years older than Hezekiah‘s Tunnel, to reach the Pool of Siloam.

Oh my, what a walk, we ventured for 30 or 40 minutes through this long and narrow passageway — down old stone stairways, modern steel wire stairways, down and down more and more stairs — finally to reach a tunnel that looked more like a crack in the earth of less than a foot and a half wide in many places. It was dimly lit and had a stone floor less than a foot wide in places.  However, even though it widened higher up, I still had to turn sideways in many places to squeeze through. When we finally reached the end and exited the tunnel,  we were in the Arab neighborhood where the taxi had originally taken us.

We continued to follow the signs as they lead us through the residential streets and at last we arrived at a worn, rusted gate painted green with paint that looked like it had begun to peel years before.  I was so hot and tired and somewhat frustrated over the detour but it set me thinking.

That path through the Canaanite tunnel with ups and downs on a rocky floor, its twists and turns squeezing through narrow spots, reminded me of the journey we take in life when we have trials. We cannot see the end and we do not know what lies around the next corner,  or what it’s gonna take to squeeze through the next difficulty, however, we must keep pressing forward.

We walked through the gate that lead to the pool and down a steep stone stairway.  No one else was there; it was a rectangular space 360C348C-BA82-4E4D-9D3D-B1E32C233EE5enclosed with rock walks and the quiet sound of water trickling through the shallow pool.    

Chris and I said a prayer.  We prayed, “Lord we’ve made this journey to this pool not that it’s a mystical place where we would get special attention to our prayers but we came here as an act of faith, a reminder that you are a God that heals, a blind man was healed here and that you are still a God that heals.”

A Man Who Can Teach Us Much About Gratitude

“No onight2ane is as capable of gratitude as one who has emerged from the kingdom of night. We know that every moment is a moment of grace, every hour an offering; not to share them would mean to betray them. Our lives no longer belong to us alone; they belong to all those who need us desperately.”

~ Elie Wiesel

These words spoken by a Jewish man born in the Carpathian Mountains of Romania. He was deported by the Hungarian government to Auschwitz with his family at 15. His mother and youngest sister were murdered immediately while he and his father remained and labored at Auschwitz. They were later moved to Buchenwald where he helplessly listened as his father was beaten to death.  When the camp was liberated in April 1945 he was 16 1/2 years old.  

Elie Wiesel spent the rest of his life fighting against injustice and man’s inhumanity to his fellow man. In 1986 he was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. Along with the quote above in his acceptance speech he says:

“I remember: it happened yesterday or eternities ago. A young Jewish boy discovered the kingdom of night. I remember his bewilderment, I remember his anguish. It all happened so fast. The ghetto. The deportation. The sealed cattle car. The fiery altar upon which the history of our people and the future of mankind were meant to be sacrificed”

In his 1999 book “Perils  of Indifference,” he says;

“Gratitude is a word that I cherish. Gratitude is what defines the happiness and humanity of the human being.”

Full text of his acceptance speech here:

Artwork from Night by Elie Wiesel – 1982

Appointed Time

4A403F71-69CB-412E-9EAF-F503AB6E5204Thankful that in this ever changing world there are some things that remain the same and bring balance to my life. It is demonstrated to me again this year in my Thanksgiving cactus. It is possibly 25 or more years old and it is large. It needed a larger pot years ago, I sometimes forget to water it, and yet every year it blooms at its appointed time  

On a larger scale the day and night rise and fall;  the seasons change,  sunshine comes after rain, young people still fall in love, children are born and the old pass away.  There is a rhythm and flow to life that encourages me to tune out the noise and remind myself I am not in control of these things but a never changing God is and He never forgets to take care of the details.