I need a friend
Someone who cares
Who understands me
Someone I can tell
My strange feeling to
And can understand them
Better than I do

What is my anger?
This internal rage .
Is it monotony
Or life’s daily cage?
Why am I a square
When all holes are round?
What are the meanings
Of life that I’ve never found?

Why does life,
Seem like an endless toll?
Why can’t I leave
The past behind me?
And forgive myself
For the faults that I see?

Even more frustrating
I find and I worry
That I’m in the same trap
Life ahead
Has no change, old things begin
And the mistakes of the past
Will be repeated again

No one to talk to
I talk to the Lord
Does he really hear me
Or like me is He bored?
Of hearing the same thoughts
Constantly run through
My head .
And why do I always think
That soon I’ll be dead?

Why is it that death
Constantly enters my mind?
Why cant I just live
And put these strange
Thoughts behind?

I need a friend
Someone who’ll say
All is OK and
Someone who’ll understand
What made me this way.

This strange chubby square
Who wants to fit in
Yet remain different too
In the way that I view things
And the things
That I do.

Is this depression?
Or a demented mind?
Am I the problem?
Why do I lock others out?
To protect from the hurt
Or is it from Fear?
That they might discover
What’s hidden in here?

1993 ~Trish Breeds