Everyone Should Have an Uncle William

Remembering my Uncle William today on the 91st anniversary of the day of his birth. He was affectionately know as UW to me and my family and he was one wild and crazy guy. If you had the pleasure of meeting him, you’d never forget him. He was a Texan’s Texan; one of a kind, a big heart, a loud voice, a swimmer, and athlete with drive and determination to live life to the fullest.

So many memories of him in my heart, here are just a few.

He was an adventurer. In the late 50’s and early 60’s, he lived and hunted and worked as a guide in Alaska. He had many trophies on his wall from those days and at Christmas he hung lights on the big moose-head in his house.

He had a heart as big as Texas: When I was very little (under three) my mother was a single mom trying to support three young children on the money she earned working as a waitress at Walgreens. She told me he would come to dinner once a week and leave a $20 bill under his plate.

He was a loving brother: As many tales as I have about him, my mother has repeated dozens more. Several years ago I recorded many of her stories on tape. He was the complete opposite of her and he extended his love to her in many ways. When I was clearing my mother’s house, I found a Valentines card he had sent her. Inside he had written over and over again until it filled every space inside the card… “I Love You!” I framed that card for her and it is with her at the nursing home.

He could be stern: When I was little I would go and stay with him and my aunt for a week in the summer. One summer I remember, I had been riding one of his bikes and when I came in, I just just let it drop to the ground and ran inside. I got a very stern (and loud) lecture on the value of things and caring for them properly. I know it made me cry but I have always remembered that and I remember it every time I am feeling lazy and am tempted to not put something away properly.

He was fun (and sometimes inappropriate): For most of my childhood we would have Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner with Uncle William, alternating houses each year. Every single year, at the dinner table, my Uncle William would tell a joke. It often revolved around the grace or a holiday theme. I can often remember asking what they meant and my mother would always say, “It is for adults.”

One I do remember, as I must have pondered it’s meaning for years. He was buttering a dinner roll and he asked, “Did you hear about the lady in the mini-skirt who went to buy butter? When she bent over the refrigerator case instead of getting butter she got bred.”

He was a teacher: For many years he taught swimming at his home in the outskirts of Houston. After he died one of his students wrote these memories on his obituary. “Bill [VH] had more influence on my life than anyone outside my family. He took me under his wing when I was only 8 years old – I loved him immediately… he asked me to work with him – I didn’t know you could make money doing something so fun… he wanted to scuba dive again – he’s the one that got me started on that – scrubbing the algae off the bottom of his pool!…. I loved the way he gave me bear-hugs. My eyes are tearing just thinking about it. I loved him so, so much and I will be forever grateful for the knowledge, experiences and love that he gave me.”

Last but not least, he was a lady’s man: After his death we found envelopes with pictures of some of his lady friends. One envelope was labeled, “naughty but nice ladies.”

Later in life, I stayed close to my UW. I volunteered and worked at the Sr. Olympics in Houston when he competed and won many events; we traveled to California to cheer him on when he did the Alcatraz swim. He shivered for 2 hours after he got out of the water that day and he told us he never would have made if that one female swimmer in front of him had not jumped in nude. He said, “I just kept trying to catch up with her!”

In the 90’s he joined us several times in Campbell River, BC salmon fishing. UW was an avid sportsman and my young son, Josh, was a a budding environmentalist. UW and Josh had a special relationship but on this trip it was challenged. UW had caught a big salmon and I guess procedure is to whack them on the head to kill them and put them in the cooler. Josh was mortified by what was happening and he told UW, “If you bonk that fish again I’m gonna bonk you!”

Dec 2010 – One Last Hug

My Uncle William was athletic and he was physically fit into his 80’s, however his mind did not keep up. He was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in his late 70’s. The last time I saw him was in December 2010. He was at a memory care facility in California. He was overjoyed to see me and Chris. We brought him some pumpkin bread from Starbucks and he kept asking me if I had made it. Our visit ended quickly when it was lunchtime and a little lady knocked at his door. I guess she was his standing lunch date and you can’t keep the ladies waiting.

He was a man of his time, he had opinions and you knew what they were but he had a charisma that drew people to him; he was bigger than life. He was my Uncle William, a mentor, a father-figure, and a friend and not only my ‘Uncle William’ but he was an uncle to my sons, my ex and to Chrissie. We will never forget him and I am thankful for his impact on my life.

God’s Kiss

This morning I received my first Covid19 vaccine. My appointment invitation came through my doctor’s office on January 19, and was scheduled at an affiliate hospital. Three days before my original appointment date, I received an e-mail to say they had cancelled my appointment to prioritize second doses. A second e-mail informed me the vaccination was rescheduled two weeks away and the location had been move to the Microsoft campus in Redmond. When it comes to change with things I am uncomfortable with in the first place, I do not react well. This was no exception.

Now generally, I am not a conspiracy-prone type of person. However, there is so much good/bad and true/false information out there, it leaves one struggling about what to believe or who to trust. First of all, I have several friends and acquaintances who for moral and/or religious reasons are adamantly opposed to the vaccine and they had been bombarding my mailbox with videos from every well meaning, self-proclaimed expert and God-fearing prophet in the ether. Secondly, I am 65 and I have only ever gotten one flu shot and that was only because I was caring for my son who was extremely ill and immune compromised. I am not an anti-vaxer; I am cautious about foreign substances in my body and even the “experts” have changed their stories. Finally, I do believe God sends us signs and messages and I have been praying for answers. When the original appointment was cancelled then moved further away to a campus that has thousands of people, I began to question whether or not I should go. Maybe it is a sign I should not, and I have had the past two weeks to fret over the issue.

Awake at 4 AM, I go downstairs to search out some final truth about this vaccine. I send a Whats-app message to a friend in Israel who has received the vaccine in hopes of gleaning some knowledge from her. She messaged back that the congregation there is online streaming a worship service. I tune in and was encouraged by the message and song. Then I searched for a God-lead perspective and I find an organization that I trust. This organization had a podcast that discussed the vaccine, the origins of the cell-lines used to test it and the moral ethical issues surrounding the use. The video that followed that one was from ZDoggMD, a doctor I have listened to in the past who has a podcast where he openly and honestly gives easy to understand explanations on medical issues. I listen to his podcast and his experience with the vaccine and why many, as he himself did, have a stronger reaction to the second dose.

By this time I have decided to go to the appointment at Microsoft and take everything one step at a time.

As you can imagine, the vaccination center there was very, very organized. People greeted me warmly at the door as I walk into a sectioned off area with attendants in plexiglass booths. They ask to see the QR Code that was sent, took my temperature and gave me a sticker to wear that says, “I’ve been screened.” (Later when it in a mirror notice it is upside down…I was in a a daze and my glasses weren’t on). I was sent down a long roped off hallway to the next check-point where they again ask to see the QR Code on my phone. Another person greeted me and took me into a room with ten plexiglass booths, where I was asked to verify my name and address, show my ID and the QR code again. When I finished I was directed to the entrance of large room with about thirty vaccination stations; there I was escorted to one of the stations, each manned with a nurse and a tech (also encased in plexiglass). The tech verified my QR Code again and the nurse greeted me and asked my name.

Now this is were things get interesting. I smile and although we all have masks on, I can see she smiles back. I tell her that I am very apprehensive about getting this vaccination. This nurse, Kim, is so kind and understanding; she tells me not to worry that I have an old nurse that she has retired from Swedish Hospital (we discover later she is really not that old… just a few months younger than me.) I tell her my son is in Swedish Hospital right now with a bowel blockage. She says she had a blockage and a resection once and that she knows all the GI’s down there.

As she starts to name names, I ask, “Do you know Dr Menon?”

She replies, “Oh my gosh he is the sweetest man.” (I agree, in many of my stories from 2013, I talk about what a guardian angel he was when my son was so very ill.)

She tells me she was in charge of the ER in the hospital where Dr. Menon did his residency and she says half jokingly that she trained him. We go on to have this semi-Love-Fest conversation about Dr Menon. I get her name and tell her I will let him know that I saw her.

The final step in this journey is waiting in a large conference room for the prescribed 15 minutes to pass to insure there is no adverse reaction to the vaccine. Ten numbered rows, ten chairs each spaced six feet apart. By time I reach my chair I am elated. All my anxiety and angst have flown away. Was this a coincidence? Or was it confirmation that even in the littlest things in life, God knows our hearts and cares for us? He, in the most amazing way, set up the plan to put my mind at ease and comfort me.

I was going to title this “God’s Care and Love – Part II” but when I got back to the office I messaged my friend in Israel to tell her the story. She replied, “Wonderful story! God kissed you today!”

Yes, yes He did.

The Behemoth

Last week my dear husband tells me he is going to come into work late because he has a delivery coming. Imagine my sobering surprise when he informs me that he purchased a 75” Q800T QLED TV. Chris’s choices and decisions have always followed the motto – Go-Big or Go-Home. Why should he change now?

Now mind you we have no TV in our living room, a medium size TV on my dresser and hubby already has a big 65” TV in his man cave. I ask why? Why? Why do we need this big thing?

My sobering surprise quickly turned to complete shock when he informed me he was going to put it in the bedroom, on top of my 6 ft wide dresser. It will be awesome he insists and it’s a smart TV we can hook our computers up to it.

When I arrived home, it was here, in the hallway; the box was as large as a twin bed. It is even more massive than I envisioned, what one might call Texas-sized. I grew up in Texas and they are proud of the slogan “Everything is Bigger in Texas.”

This TV is against everything I am comfortable with — being subtle, understated, quiet and doing everything you can to not stand out or be noticed. Even so, I do not protest. I’ll tell you why, because Chris works hard, and if this big TV makes him happy then I am happy for him to have it. Chris will be 70 soon and over the past few years advancing age makes one realize life is short – a reminder to not sweat the small stuff. Although, this TV is big, very big, its presence in my bedroom is insignificant… not worth a battle, small stuff.

This morning we installed this behemoth. I’ll spare you the details of two senior citizens pushing and pulling it up a flight of stairs with a 45° turn near the top, or the details of me lifting it shoulder high to get it on top of my dresser with my frozen shoulder or after 1.5 hours spent setting up and being unable to sync to Comcast. It finally connects… then we learn the cable system was down. What timing.

So my Texas-sized 75” Q800T QLED is firmly on it’s 40” pedestal (my dresser) and it is awesome. Watching from my adjustable bed which is only 4’ away is like be front and center at a Texas drive-in theater. All we need are the swing sets and monkey bars out front for the kids and the popcorn. Don’t forget the popcorn.

God’s Care and Love

In searching for an old email I found this note from 2006. I remember the incident well but had forgotten the lesson I learned.

It was early October and I was sitting at my desk at the office when I heard a disconcerting racket from about 10-15 crows out back. I looked out the window and saw what I thought was a mother duck in a shallow ditch trying to protect her duckling from the crows.

I quickly hurried down the stairs outside and as soon as my feet hit the bottom step the crows dispersed like a crowd of hoodlums that had gathered to watch a fight. I walked over to the area of the ditch and couldn’t see a duck or duckling or anything. Then I looked under a patch of grass and there was a small frightened pigeon laying on the ground. I looked around for the crows that had quieted down considerably and I saw the thing that I thought was a duck. It was a huge hawk sitting on a low branch in a nearby cedar tree! He had been attacking the pigeon and the crows were either calling for help or more likely cheering him on hoping for some leftovers.

I wasn’t sure what to do and I was a little hesitant to pick the pigeon up without a gloves or a towel, but when I looked up in the tree again I knew if I walked off to get something that HAWK would finish off his catch. So I reach down and picked up the pigeon; he was so scared I could feel his little heart beating wildly in my hand. He had one small puncture wound under his wing. He did not struggle with me at all; I guess at the time, I was the lesser of two evils. I put him in a little outside storage area off the front deck at the office with some food and water. I left the door slightly open should he want to leave. My pigeon friend was still there the next day although not as happy to see me. When I checked on him the following day he was gone.

I know that this is the way of nature. The hawk was beautiful and needed to survive as well, but that day, this poor little pigeon was going to be rescued. Chris and I had been going through a stressful period with enemies attacking relentlessly and there were groups of gawkers watching on the sidelines waiting for us to be devoured. Considering all these things, I really needed this little pigeon to be rescued and saved.

It was an illustration to me of how God cares for us even when it seems we are being attacked on all sides. I realized He cares for me and loves me more than I cared for this little wild pigeon that I wasn’t going to abandon to be destroyed by his enemy the hawk.

A gentle comforting reminder that God is always watching over me and protecting me from my enemies. He picks me up, takes me in his arms and shelters me in his hiding place.

Lord, how I love you! For you have done such tremendous things for me. The Lord is my fort where I can enter and be safe; no one can follow me in and slay me. He is a rugged mountain where I hide; he is my Savior, a rock where none can reach me, and a tower of safety. He is my shield. He is like the strong horn of a mighty fighting bull. All I need to do is cry to him—oh, praise the Lord—and I am saved from all my enemies! ~ Psalm 18:1-3 NLT

Lost Souls

Chris and I went to Seattle back in November to drop something off for youngest son. We stop at a local favorite, Ivar’s Fish Bar, for fish and chips. As we watched people wait in line, properly social distanced, I said to Chris, “People in the city all look like they are lost souls.”

Maybe they were just caught up in their thoughts as they wait for their orders, but it seemed they were sad. You could see no smiles as they all had masks but also there was no nods or greetings, no air of happiness around them, people that were together just stared at the ground. The mood was as grey as the day.

As we left, we drove past rows and rows of tents, in the parks on the roadside, in parking lots and on the sidewalks in front of homes and businesses. I remember just 7 years ago when I lived in Seattle with JD for six months that I would occasionally see a tent or homeless camp. Now, trying to figure out what changed it all, is mind boggling. Especially in this city where there is so much opportunity and wealth.

Drugs are a big part and our lenient system has drawn people here from other areas. It is heartbreaking for the people, those on the streets and those trying to raise their families and work.

Chris is on the board of the local homeless shelter and everyone’s situation is different and complex. It takes more than just providing shelter, it takes investing in their lives and providing services to overcome the crisis they are in, whether it is mental illness, drugs, alcohol or abuse. Sometimes tough love is appropriate.

A few weeks after our Seattle trip, Eric Johnson’s “Fight for the Soul of Seattle” documentary was released, a follow-up to his March 2019 piece, “Seattle is Dying” which received Edward R. Murrow Regional Award for documentary as well as a Northwest NATAS Emmy Award for Documentary. I watched the 90 minute video in tears; not only for the lost, addicted and forgotten but because it seems we have no ability to provide long lasting help for the people.

The problem overall seems insurmountable. How can I, as one person, fix this enormous problem with so many complicated and unique variables? I cannot, other than supporting sound policies. However, I am of the belief that God often places people in our path that need guidance. Many times, we have extended support for people who have lost there way. Sometimes it lasts only a few weeks, and for others it is a long process. Who knows if there was really a lasting impact on their lives but Chris and I are in one accord about this: We cannot help the whole world but we can help the one in front of us.

Lost souls, they are out there. Offer what you can when they are in front of you, it may only be a granola bar in your pocket but if we all add a drop to of kindness maybe it will grow in to a sea of compassion.

Palindrome Day 1/20/21


Today is a palindrome day, the first of a 10 day stretch of them. The date is read the say forward and backwards, a good analogy for the times…Everything will be the same forward and backwards.

God is on the throne, His will be done. People will love and people will hate, there will be births and there will be deaths, good and evil, loyalty and betrayal, leaders will rise up and leaders will fall. If you are looking for something new, something different, want change? Don’t look to any leader. Look to God.

My prayer: God, help me look into my own heart, examine my own thoughts and actions find the what it takes to overlook the flaws in others and make the change in my heart and mind.

Nothing new on this earth, set your heart on eternity.


Ecclesiastes 1:9-18 GNT
What has happened before will happen again. What has been done before will be done again. There is nothing new in the whole world.
“Look,” they say, “here is something new!” But no, it has all happened before, long before we were born.
No one remembers what has happened in the past, and no one in days to come will remember what happens between now and then.
I, the Philosopher, have been king over Israel in Jerusalem. I determined that I would examine and study all the things that are done in this world. God has laid a miserable fate upon us. I have seen everything done in this world, and I tell you, it is all useless. It is like chasing the wind.
You can’t straighten out what is crooked; you can’t count things that aren’t there.
I told myself, “I have become a great man, far wiser than anyone who ruled Jerusalem before me. I know what wisdom and knowledge really are.”
I was determined to learn the difference between knowledge and foolishness, wisdom and madness. But I found out that I might as well be chasing the wind.
The wiser you are, the more worries you have; the more you know, the more it hurts.

No Fight Left … Only Love

I saw my mother yesterday. She was a little confused and in quarantine because of her latest hospital visit.

Over the years my mother and I have had our shared joy and trials, times when we saw eye-to-eye and many times that we clashed. There were times I felt suffocated and pulled away and times she clung tighter.

The last few years because of her decline into dementia it seemed the clashes were more frequent and heated. I was not-so-affectionately called the “bossyone” In reality, I was trying to enable the very thing she wanted, to remain independent in her home, by making sound decisions and managing her finances.

An unfortunate fall in 2018 lead her to rehab where she could no longer hide her advancing dementia.

She will still produce a beautiful smile on request.

We have been through a process the last three years. Just as infant grows and advances at a rapid pace between birth and four years. It seems dementia takes a turn and in three short years my mothers abilities have declined at a rapid pace.

She had surgery in October and the decline has been even more sharp since then. When I saw her this week she was so frail and helpless, she stared off into space as a newborn does when it is seeing the strange new world for the first time. She found comfort in being held, holding my hand and was soothed by the sound of music – the old hymns she would play for hours. The words to those she has not forgotten.

We have gone from my birth and total dependence, to growing, changing, challenging, disagreements, coming together, growing apart, to facing the honest truth of our relationship. Then it reversed: growing apart, coming together, disagreements, challenging, changing (especially in my views about her illness and motives), to her growing old and total dependence on others.

Now she just wants to be loved, be safe and protected. We have come full circle from the newborn daughter a mother held in her arms 65 years ago to yesterday as a daughter held her innocent elderly mother in her arms.

I braided her hair and put the pearl necklace on her that my auntie sent. Girls should always wear their pearls.

There is no fight left, what is left is only pure love.

The New Year’s Gate

Several years ago my friend Pam introduced me to this poem, God Knows, written 1908 by Minnie Louise Haskins. Since that time I have posted this photo at the eve of the new year with the first verse that begins… And I said to the man who stood at the gate of the year: “Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown.” “Go out into the darkness and put your hand into the Hand of God.
That shall be to you better than light and safer than a known way.”

I immediately fell in love with her wisdom and prose on how to face the unknown… that holding God’s hand is safer than knowing the way. How awesome is that?

I occasionally see this photo in my phone’s photo album and it is a reminder to me that whatever lies ahead is solely in His hands and God has always been beside me.

This year that has been horrific for many, has spared me most of the struggles to which others have suffered. However there has been loss; due to covid – I lost a friend and a cousin. Sadly, I also lost three friends to cancer and a step-brother to heart failure. Every loss is painful, every struggle is trying but I have learned from past trials that these days and times will pass.

In 2013 and 2014 there were the days that I feared taking another breath because I was afraid of what the future would deliver. I wanted time to freeze and stand still, but however bleak the future seemed, God walked me through. It is remembering those moments and countless ones before that help me walk by faith into the future.

Each time God showed me His compassion, His love, His strength, it gave me one more brick to stand on and when trials come, I have those bricks from His past faithfulness to rely on for the courage to face each day. Where I once fell apart, I may now mourn and grieve but I know God has a plan and He will see me to the other side.

As I stand at the gate of this new year, I put my hand in the hand of God.
Whatever 2021 brings, I will strive to:
Make everyday a new beginning;
Remember every evening as the sun sets, to give thanks for the blessings in my life;
Forgive others, and forgive myself and ask for forgiveness for the wrongs I have done.
Remind myself, that God is always faithful.

The Lord’s acts of mercy indeed do not end, For His compassions do not fail. They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness. Lamentations 3:22-23 NAS

God Knows

And I said to the man who stood at the gate of the year:
“Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown.”
And he replied:
“Go out into the darkness and put your hand into the Hand of God.
That shall be to you better than light and safer than a known way.”
So I went forth, and finding the Hand of God, trod gladly into the night.
And He led me towards the hills and the breaking of day in the lone East.

So heart be still:
What need our little life
Our human life to know,
If God hath comprehension?
In all the dizzy strife
Of things both high and low,
God hideth His intention.

God knows. His will
Is best. The stretch of years
Which wind ahead, so dim
To our imperfect vision,
Are clear to God. Our fears
Are premature; In Him,
All time hath full provision.

Then rest: until
God moves to lift the veil
From our impatient eyes,
When, as the sweeter features
Of Life’s stern face we hail,
Fair beyond all surmise
God’s thought around His creatures
Our mind shall fill.

Minnie Louise Haskins 1908

Christmas Is

Never fear, do not let in fear,
Even in this unbalanced and unpredictable year.
Christmastime will still appear.

Never give way to doubt, do not doubt.
Although 2020 had us cast about,
It will not keep the Christmas spirit out.

Always hope, do not lose hope,
Although at times we could not cope,
This spirit won’t stop, not this one, nope.

Pray for peace, peace from within.
If not today, pray we may understand when,
And search our hearts, so we may know how to begin.

Christmas teaches love and our faith it renews;
Faith in ourselves, and others if we choose,
Respect for our own and also their views.

Continue to love, love does not end.
Keep reaching out to Family and reach to a friend
For Christmas is so much more than a trend.

In the new year we’ll make a fresh start;
We will not let these trials tear us apart.
For Christmas is always deep in our heart.

Do not fear, Do not doubt, Always have hope, Pray for peace, Renew your faith and Continue to Love


~ trish b (c) 2020

My Flag

I am, right or wrong, always looking for hidden meanings in occurrences of simple things I see everyday.

I have an American flag that is mounted to my garage. I can see it from my kitchen window and I often admire its red, white and navy blue colors against the sky blue of my house.

This particular flag has been waving there since 2017. I retired its predecessor by folding it and placing it in the flag box at the local American Legion Post. There it will be part of an annual disposal ceremony where unserviceable flags are respectfully and honorably retired from life.

https://www.legion.org/flag/ceremony

This flag, being an all weather flag, is on display all year and as it is illuminated by the light beside it; it stays up night and day.

As well as being able to view it from my kitchen window, I also see it via my security cameras from work. Some blustery days I get many notifications as my flag waves wildly in the the wind. It will spread out to full display and flip overhead to spread out again.

Yesterday, I received a notification from the camera but when I looked my flag was not there. How could that be? It was in a flag mount, mounted to the wall in a slot that holds the pole at a downward angle. Was it stolen?

I arrived home late last night with high wind and heavy rain still pounding around me and I wasn’t able to look for my flag. This morning before dawn, I go downstairs to make coffee and look out the window to see my flag lying on the ground. Somehow yesterday’s wind unseated it from its mount and threw it to the ground.

I looked at my flag laying there in the dark and that’s when my mind started exploring the symbolism of this scene. Was this sign of current events, was it a sign of defeat or even death of the values and freedoms for which it stands?

More than the particulars of stars, stripes, the red, the white and the blue but the values, freedoms, unity, and justice.

“I pledge (promise) allegiance (loyalty and commitment) to the flag (the symbol) of the United (joined together for a common purpose) States of America , and to the republic (state where sovereignty rests with the people) for which it stands (represents), one nation under God (a country formed under a creator and ruler of the universe and source of all moral authority), indivisible (unable to divide or be separated) with liberty (freedom) and justice (fairness) for all (each and every citizen).”

My hope and prayer is that we have not fallen so far that there is no more loyalty to the republic that the flag represents, that we are not becoming so divided that we can no longer reach common ground, that our flag indeed stands for freedom and fairness for each and every citizen… those born here and those who have chosen to make this great country their home. Brave men and women have fought and died for the ideals and principals this flag represents. It honors them.

As for my flag, I will loving retrieve it, clean it and proudly display it once again. May the nation and principals for which it stands endure forever.

Longing for Peace

While we are lamenting about this year 2020 and the horrors of how awful it has been, I am reminded of a Christmastime in a year not so far in the distant past when I was in distress over the events of the year past.

It was 2014, there was unrest around the world. Evil people were plotting their evil schemes and committing unspeakable crimes on the innocent. However, we tend to forget; these were my sorrows then.

I’m having a really hard time finding the holiday spirit. Where are the 300 young girls that were kidnapped? A few days of news and we moved on. How many people have been beheaded? Horror at the first one then successively our shock and outrage has waned. Planes shot down, planes never found; not even a scrap of metal. Worshippers brutally stabbed inside their synagogue. Children slaughtered. Anger, hate, anger, hate everywhere — I cannot be consoled by holiday lights and trimmings. The sorrow is burning deep in my heart.

We feed off the sensationalization of it all, but move on like it was yesterday’s a bad weather. Real evil exists in people and groups and they are actively plotting their next move. Real evil!

I long for peace.

In 2014, I was longing for peace. I think every year that is my prayer. Covid 19 has taken many lives, it has isolated us from our loved ones, our spiritual support and destroyed the financial stability of many families. However in this storm we have also come to realize many things we had taken for granted. The one most important thing we take for granted, our freedoms.

I don’t know what 2021 will hold. Will it be worse than 2020 or 2014? Will we come together? Will we see each others smiles again? Will we go back to our churches and congregations and sing praises again? We will have peace?

I don’t know.

I have no insight to the future. I just know that whatever it holds, God will see me through or he’ll call me home.

For a Child will be born to us, a Son will be given to us; And the government will rest on His shoulders; And His name will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Eternal Father, Prince of Peace. ~ Isaiah 9:6 NAS

Remembering ~ Jesse ~

My friend Jesse was called to his heavenly home on Thanksgiving. Over the years Jesse and I had many, not heated, but terse discussions regarding our beliefs, our politics, social issues, etc. Sometimes I would get very frustrated over the fact I could post the most innocent thing and Jesse would find a way to make a controversy out of it. He was passionate about his beliefs and there were times he challenged me to think about things differently. I imagine him today in Heaven debating the greatest theological minds and loving every minute.

I first met Jesse through mutual friends, Mel and Elaine, who no doubt have greeted him in Heaven.  Mel, like Jesse, was a proponent of the unorganized church  and they would meet with a group of men at the local Shari’s restaurant once a week.

When we moved to a piece of property near Jesse on Union Hill, we hired him to help us clear the land so we could build a house.  He was a wild man in the trees.  He’d climb to the very top and snap the limbs off on his way up.  I have a video of him riding high in the treetops.

One Saturday morning after we had cleared the land and were living in a travel trailer on the property, Jesse came down the drive and gave us a little kitten that his dog Sarge had drug out from underneath his truck.  We named him Fang because according to Jesse he put up a good defense against Sarge’s advances. Fang became part of our household along with our two little dogs and adult cat PC.  

A few weeks after Fang became part of our family, PC got lost in the woods away from the clearing.  I could hear him howling in the forest so I trekked out calling for him in a pair of shorts and flip flops.  As I was looking I stepped up on an old rotten stump to get a better view.  As soon as I stepped on the stump an army of yellow jackets came swarming out from underneath my feet, stinging and attacking me violently.  In an effort to escape,  I lost my shoe and I was frantic – jumping and trying to get away through the dense underbrush.  It was then I began to think this forest life was not for me.  

Jesse stopped by that evening to say hello and talk about life and God as he often did.  When he heard my tale of woe, he immediately got up, left and came back a few minutes later armed with a can of hornet spray.

Now imagine this, it was dusk, Jesse was wearing only a yellow tank top, a cap, shorts and sneakers.  With no other protection, he marched into the forest with this can of hornet spray and a big stick.  He squatted in front of the rotten stump and began to dig into the nest with the stick and spray at the same time.  He was like the avenger!  Shockingly he did not get one sting but hundreds of hornets were massacred that night.

That’s the way Jesse did things, straight forward –  without fear.  No fear, only boldness about his faith as well.  He was always ready for a great discussion or debate.

The last time I saw Jesse and Janna they stayed a few nights with us before venturing out to the east coast to be nearer his son and his family.  Jesse spent a few days working on and repairing their motor-home for the journey.  This motor-home was older and packed to the gills, I was more than skeptical of its ability to make it across country.   Nonetheless, venture off they did, no fear, only faith in God to take care of them on the journey.  

As we watched them drive away, I told Chris I feel like I am watching one of my kids drive off into the big wide world and I need to intervene or protect them.  However, I know now what Jesse knew then, he relied on his God for protection and guidance.  His faith was great and it saw him through many tough times.  

For in the gospel the righteousness of God is revealed—a righteousness that is by faith from first to last, just as it is written: “The righteous will live by faith.”  Romans 1:17 NIV

America Gives Thanks

One week until Thanksgiving and I thought I would share my sentiments and memories from last year about Thanksgivings past.

There so much controversary over the family gatherings this year it saddens my heart that these issues may overshadow the spirit and intent of the holiday.

I won’t be at the American Legion this year and my mom won’t be able to have a celebration with anyone of us. It will be just Chris and I, or possibly with a few friends, but one thing for certain, we will sit around the table and say thank you for the many, many, blessings we have in this country.

We are not infallible, but we are a great nation; we are caring and generous people; we are a people who recognize with gratitude the freedoms we share. America is the dream of many people around the world. We will get through this and we will come back stronger. This is our holiday and next Thursday, whatever the circumstances, we will bow our heads and give thanks.

Thanksgiving

Rogelio, My Friend

It was a drizzly grey day outside today. Rogelio showed up at 7 AM to do a fall clean up of my yard.

We met Rogelio 18 years ago. He had a house in the next town over that was built near abandoned coal mines and he needed an analysis done which our company did for him. Through the process he let us know he did side jobs landscaping, so as we had 3.5 acres of yard to care for, we hired him to help us.

Rogelio has so many amazing qualities the at the top of the list is his skill to turn the mess of my yard into a woodland paradise. He cleared the beds, he created rock gardens, trimmed the shrubbery, edged the lawn and he with his sons would more in 8 hours than I could accomplish in months.

I have always told people that Rogelio got all the credit for the beauty in my garden.

Rogelio has shared many other talents with us. He has helped build fences, helped haul away junk, polished concrete floors, updated and installed lighting, laid patio bricks and the list could go on and on. He has always been willing to help in any way. He would see something that needed attention, set a proposal for getting it done and get it done he would.

He is a man with a natural God-given wisdom. He believes hard work is the key to happy life.

Rogelio would say that the struggles of life makes you strong and gives you a will to live. “Man has to fight for life.”

Yep, this is a just out-of-bed uncombed hair photo. Not everyone gets to see me like this!

Through the years we have gotten to know each others families. We have shared our common concerns for our aging parents, his father and mother in Mexico, and my mother in Texas.

A few months ago he showed up at the house on a Saturday morning with a bottle of Tequila he brought back from Mexico. As you can see below it was no regular bottle of the Tequila. It was a massive big bottle. He told Chris he had been in Mexico helping people, he had brought money and supplies to family and friends. He said that helping others was something he learned from Chris. Always be generous and you will always have more to share. Humbling.

As the years have gone by we all have aged. Rogelio’s hair has a tinge of gray now but he still works as hard as he did in his 30’s. He showed up at 7AM this morning and worked until 3. A long day in the drizzling rain and in the end the yard was beautiful and ready for winter. I asked if it was getting to be too much for him, he says not. He loves the serenity of this place and being outdoors. Before he left, we visited a while. We talked about our families, the virus and the measures we are all taking to stay safe. We thanked him, he thanked us.

This is Rogelio my friend. He makes my garden beautiful and I am thankful for him.

Finding My Grateful Heart

“If you concentrate on finding whatever is good in every situation, you will discover that your life will suddenly be filled with gratitude, a feeling that nurtures the soul.”
~ Rabbi Harold Kushner

Looking back through the history of just my life, I am wondering if I can find good in every situation? This is a tall order. It cannot be done with my own power but only by endeavoring to see it through the lens of God’s eyes.

Yes, there were hardships and obstacles that dominated my youth but I can recognize how they helped form who I am today. In many ways I think those experiences help me look at others who struggle with a compassionate heart and less of a judging mindset.

More recent trials I find harder to envision the blessings with my inadequate mortal eyes. However, for every injustice I can find mercy, for every harsh word a kind one and for every heartache a joy.

In the bigger picture of things… I. Am. So. Blessed!

I really have nothing to complain about, yet I do complain. Praying my gratitude overshadows my grumbles today and that my heart will be continually grateful.

“He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also He has put eternity in their hearts, except that no one can find out the work that God does from beginning to end.” Ecclesiastes 3:11 NKJV

Gratitude: For our Veterans

Veterans, today I honor and thank you for serving in defense of our freedoms and the freedom of people all around the world.

I did some research and found that those currently serving in the US Military, all branches, comprises (.4%) less than HALF of ONE PERCENT of the population of the United States. In 1970 during the Vietnam War it was only 1.4%

Today there are 18.2 million veterans living in the US going back to WWII. So total the percent of US citizen still living is just 5.5% of the population.

They truly are, and were, the select, the brave and the few who sacrificed much for the protection and security of the 99% of the rest of us.

They have given of their heart, their soul and shed their blood; they did so for love of their country, with a sense of honor and pride. Their devotion does not fade. They are a noble group, a very small percentage of our population who answered the call to serve.

My promise is to honor and remember everyday and keep them always on my heart and in my prayers.

May God bless you and keep you and protect your heart and mind.

Known Only to Him

Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the Lord,
I will be joyful in God my Savior.
The Sovereign Lord is my strength;
he makes my feet like the feet of a deer,
he enables me to tread on the heights.
Hab 3:17-19

Election night, 2000, I was with Chris sitting at SeaTac airport with a group from our congregation headed to Israel to meet our pastors and begin a tour of the Holy Land.

People had their eyes on the TV’s throughout the airport waiting for election results. Just before we boarded the plane around midnight, all the news outlets announced that Al Gore had won the presidency. Fast forward eighteen hours later when we landed in Israel and everything had changed. Nothing was certain, Florida was undecided, hanging chad problems prompted microscopic evaluations of ballots and recounts began. Each morning when we boarded the tour bus there was an update, no final decision on US Presidential election.

We were sheltered from the daily bombardment of the drama going on at home. We spent our time in Israel praying for the people in the land and praying for God’s will to be done.

We returned twelve days later on November 20 and still no decision. Not until December 12, did the Supreme Court end the Florida recount and George W Bush was declared the winner.

I am taking a lesson from that period in time; listening to no news, no talking heads, no analyst and putting my faith in God and knowing He is the ultimate decision maker.

I often found myself cringing at Trump’s comments and brashness. However, I was somewhat reassured that at least I knew how he truly felt about an issue as opposed to a typical politician (any party) who speak out of both sides of their mouth. I had friends in 2016 that warned me Trump would destroy the country, that he would start WW3, that the LGBTQ community would be in fear for their lives. None of that came to pass. All the horrifying things people on the opposing side are saying about the current administration are likely to not be as tragic either.

God often uses our flaws for His good. Today, I have been thinking about the other half of the country and how we have such polar opposite views on so many things. I have been praying for wisdom to see more of what I have in common with the other side and to love and not hate.

I keeping singing the hymn “Known Only to Him” over in my head and this verse:
“I know not what the future holds but I know who holds the future.”

Good News & Blessings from 2009

I keep coming across snippets of things I wrote many years ago. Here is one from March 2009.

Eleven years ago and I was seeing the negative impact of the main stream media; the constant bombardment of bad news and the attempts to control us by fear.

Since then, the rhetoric has ramped up, the hate has increased, the fringe radical groups are given more and more attention with less and less accountability.

In this month of Thanksgiving be thankful for the blessings we have. Turn your back on those who wish to divide us. Help those less fortunate, share your talents, share your blessings and share some love. ❤️

GOOD NEWS & BLESSINGS

Mar 14 2009

Good News

Today I live in America and it is still the place where people from all over the world want to come to fulfill their dreams.

Good News
Today I live in America and it is still the place where people from all over the world want to come to fulfill their dreams.

Are we always right? No
Have we been Blessed? Yes
Even today, do we have more food, shelter, jobs,opportunities, & wealth than most of the world? Yes

Stop complaining, Start Living…

Stop listening to the news… it seems they are now thriving on “FEAR MONGERING”

Find “your” belief in the American Dream that others risk their life to come here for.

The sky is not falling and Americans aren’t a nation of Chicken Littles. We are people that face challenges straight on, keep putting one foot in front of the other and keep going.

And again …turn off the TV and the News…. it is depressing, it is brainwashing, it kills your motivation, it makes you want to give up.

You will be much happier!

Oh and by the way, It is a beautiful world!

Life Will Find a Way

I came across this photo I took on this day three years ago. It is a picture of a tiny fern growing underneath a concrete ledge.

The amazing thing about this fern is that the ledge where it is growing is on the 47th floor of the Westin Hotel in downtown Seattle, 449 ft above the city.

At the time I took this photo, I was struck by the ability of such a small plant to take root and grow in a thin crack of concrete. How far and how high did the spores need to travel to reach this lofty height and settle in? No fertilizer, no special care or tending just sun and rain. I know rain seems to be in abundance in Seattle but this fern had most likely rooted during the warm summer. Did it sustain itself from the fog and warm moist ocean air that came in from the Puget Sound? How exactly did it find that “one spot” to lodge itself, take root and hold on in the winds that blow in off the water that are aided and strengthened by the effects of the Olympic Mountains? The answer, only my conclusion and insight here; Life and the will to survive is strong and even a fern finds a way to carry on.

It is a promising sign that even in the harshest circumstances life will find a way to thrive. Living in this time of lockdowns and corona virus where many are afraid for the future. Take heart because just like this little fern, growing under the ledge on the 47th floor of the Westin Hotel in downtown Seattle, we will find a way to adapt and persevere even though it’s not always easy.

Above and Beyond

With all the negative press regarding law enforcement officers, I’d like to share a note from 5 years ago when I gave shout of praise to one special officer my life.

The police officers I know have huge hearts, although those big hearts aren’t always visible to all. Mostly we see their tough exteriors not the soft and sweet interiors.

This special officer is my son who is a LEO in Colorado. At the time of this event he was a detective and part of his job is handling elder abuse cases. He had been sent some information on an elderly lady who officers met due to an arrest they made at her residence. When the officers were there they noticed the lady had a rotten floor in front of her doorway and passed this information to him wondering if someone could help her get it repaired.

He made some calls and got a donation from Home Depot and he went on his own time and made the needed repairs her stairs and her floor.

As he got to know the lady, he realized she had been living in this home in Colorado for 44 years and for the past four years without a furnace. 

So he made some calls and located a company to donate a furnace. Because she had no furnace, her pipes had frozen and she also had no water. He also located a company to donate that repair.

Her roof leaked, he found someone to fix her roof.

There were relatives (ne’er-do-wells) that had been taking advantage of her over the years and had left junk all over her house; he organize teams of volunteers to help clean it up.

Then he organized donations for new carpet and new appliances.

All this was done over a month’s time – he worked on his free time and his days off to help her.

We hear all to often about the “bad cops” (the less than one half of one percent). That means for every 5 bad cops there are 995 good ones, generous ones, caring ones… ones that go above and beyond to help the helpless, give a strength to the weak and elderly, and put their lives in the line of fire to protect strangers and members of their communities.

Law enforcement is a tough job. Everyone should walk their walk a few miles to fully understand the challenges and rewards.

PS: I did not get approval to tell his story. He’d never seek accolades on his own. I’m claiming Mother’s privilege.